Saturday, September 17, 2005

Stability amidst Mosaic Pieces...

As you read this please know ahead of time that I am Perfectly safe, healthy, and alright! And from the looks of things, no one else was harmed either.**

It was like for one brief moment of time I stepped into a very disconnected world. It had swirls of colors, a conglomiration of sounds, and a confusing waterfall of emotions. It has taken a while to put the pieces together and to paint the entire canvas. But these are the pieces of the picture to the best of my recollection...

Initially, I think it was a feeling. I wasn't fearful, but something wasn't right. My eyes scanned the airport shuttle I was traveling in and it was as though we were floating--sideways. I can remember someone screaming. The woman I was talking to turning white. I looked out the window to see cars...a lot of them, in really strange places all across the road. It wasn't long afterwards that I realized it wasn't them scattered in odd places, but it was the shuttle I was in. We were infact heading sideways into oncoming traffic. I can also remember watching as glass was flying all around me. I remember shielding my face. There is something amidst this that still confuses me...a peice that still hasn't been brought into complete focus. At one point I raised my head from my hands and there was a metal pole crashing through the window not 6 seats in front of me. Later when I looked it wasn't there--did I imagine it? I can only think that I was so glad of the seat that I had chosen!! After we stopped, there were a lot of people yelling and talking excitedly. Faces were surrounding us from the outside as they were pressed up against the windows. I was confused. I didn't know what they wanted, what they so urgently were trying to communicate, or what I should do. I thought of a lot of things I wanted to say, but oddly enough it was though my tongue weighed a hundred pounds. I couldn't speak, and because of fear, I also couldn't move! I heard someone yell something about smoke and that we needed to get out immediately. It must have been the kick I needed because I was instantly on my feet clinging to my ridiculously large and much too heavy suitcase. The driver stared at us in an erie state of confusion as those around me screamed at her to open up the doors. Im still not sure how they got open because I don't think she ever moved. Someone must have opened them from the outside. When we finally were a safe distance away from the vehical I surveyed the scene. Cars were everywhere. Some were smoking. Some had dents. Some were obviously totalled. I heard someone say that we had slammed into at least 8 cars, as well as a large metal fence that we went competely through before plowing into the airport parking lot. Parked cars had smashed together one hitting the other like dominoes. Because we all needed to catch our flights we were almost instantly wisked away. After feeling completely paralyzed and being dropped off at my gate, I jumped into action. I had a flight to catch!! So I quickly found my airline, ran over to my ticket counter, and began typing in my info for my electronic ticket--determined to get on my flight! It was after I put down by bag that I realized I was shaking uncontrollably--I tried to ignore it and type in all of my info anyway, but it took a significant amt of time. I could barely push buttons and for the life of me I couldn't make any sense of the thoughts and scenes flashing through my mind. I finally made it to my gate, ticket in hand, eyes brimming with tears but also biting my lip to gain composure. I was mustering up what little strength I still had-- determined to be strong. Still trembling, I found an empty piece of floor off by myself. I sat down, not really sure what had just happened, and took a deep breath.
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Like I said earlier I am perfectly fine! The Lord was carrying me the entire time, close to his heart. By the Lord's grace, earlier that same day, a friend gave me a verse that I am mulling over now as I recount this experience. Isaiah 33:6 "And He shall be the stability of your times..." Im not sure Ive ever read this verse before.

And HE shall be the stability.
He will be my STABILITY.
HE will BE.

I love the truth rooted deeply in this passage. Whether seeking to put the pieces of this mosaic together, stepping into a new or scary situation, or wrestling through a specific heart issues, He is my stability.

Let us not forget this truth dearly Beloved!!!!